These are worrisome signs your relationship isn’t healthy, according toYourTango.
Depression can come from an imbalance of power.
Depression can feel likeyou’re under aperpetual dark cloud.
PhotoAlto/Frederic Cirou
It also causes uncharacteristically negative thoughts about yourself, others, and your future.
Here are 10relationship warning signsto note.
They do, however, warn you to take adequate safety measures.
(Also, be aware that women and men are equally likely toexperience depressioninrelationships.)
Depression can emerge when you feel smaller and less powerful than the person you’re interacting with.
Not all power differences create depression, though.
Similarly, employers have more power than employees.
Inlove relationshipsbetween two adults, however, shared power is healthier.
Criticism like “You shouldn’t have bought that new sweater” is a put-down.
Constructive feedback is a not problem, but criticism is.
By contrast, critical words and a judgmental tone of voice make criticism problematic.
Bossy attitudes are demoralizing.
No one likes being told what to do.
It’s better to ask.
Requests allow for yes or no as an answer.
Remember: depression can be a disorder of power.
In a healthy relationship, both of your concerns need to count.
That’s true whether you’re wondering what to eat for dinner or deciding where to live.
If your voice doesn’t seem to matter, you’ll be at risk for feeling powerless.
Depression can be “contagious”.
When someone is depressed, they tend to see the worldincluding youthrough dark glasses.
If you adopt your partner’s view, you’ll sink down emotionally, too.
Anger spreads toxic negative energy.
This toxicity can induce depression in the person on the receiving end.
Anger is disturbing to witness, even for onlookers.
For direct recipients of anger, the toxicity is even more unpleasant.
All of these forms of abuse are incompatible with a loving relationship.
The impulse to hurt someone is the opposite of the impulse to love, nurture, and be intimate.
Any form of putting you down can engender depression.
Any form of appreciation adds to good feelings.
It’s pretty simple.
By contrast, a partner who does not do their part is passively provocative.
The irritation or anger you will feel in response signals that you’re not getting a full adult partner.
So, if you don’t want to feel depressed because of your relationship (and who would?
), pay attention to these signs.
Discuss them with your partner, but do so carefully.
Complaints and criticism might invite your partner to either feel depressed themselves or argue.
Originally written by Dr. Susan Heitler,YourTango
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