(And that can also trigger all sorts of interestingfeelingsfor Black people.)
George Floyds killing started a national and international crisis, therapistMyisha Jackson, L.P.C., tells SELF.
And as she points out, many of us cant rely on our normal coping mechanisms.
Amrita Marino
Below, several therapists share the most common emotional themes theyre hearing from Black people in America.
Youreallowed to feelwhatever is coming up.
Anger is ausefuland healthy emotion.
If you find yourself angry, its crucial to allow yourself to feel it.
So if nothing else, youre in illustrious company.
Griefcan include many emotions, including anger, sadness, numbness, and a host of other feelings.
But ultimately it is elicited by the loss of something or someone important to you.
Each of these deaths is a loss, and grief is a valid reaction.
In short: Grief is a reasonable reaction to being Black in America right now.
Youre tired, burned out, or downright exhausted.
Racism and police killings arent new.
Many Black clients are tired of having to explain why Black lives matter.
They are tired of these acts happening over and over again, only to seemingly fall on deaf ears.
You might have responsibilitiesat workto deal with.
Several therapists mentioned that clients are feeling overwhelmed by all of the competing priorities and tensions around them.
Its also not uncommon to feel a mix of strong emotions, which could leave you feeling overwhelmed.
If youre anything like me,anxiousnessmight be one of your predominant emotional reactions.
In fact, many of the therapists I chatted with mentioned it.
Theyre wondering if justice is going to be served this time and what is going to happen next.
Youre relieved to see so much support.
As a result, people are feeling relief that [other] people are acting out, Jackson explains.
Its not just Black people who are upset.
So if youre feeling relieved by the amount of support fromnon-Black allies, youre in good company.
Youre a little skeptical of all these allies.
Harshom-Brathwaite says some of her clients are side-eyeing allies and processing that in therapy.
If you look around at all of the outrage and feel stronger than ever,youre not alone.
Feeling strong and capable is such an important component of fighting for justice.
Youre a little jealous and experiencing FOMO.
Perhaps you were part of other movements that didnt benefit from widespread public sympathy.
Its also perfectly fine to take a moment to reflect on how you want to participate going forward.
This fight is long, and the opportunities to donate, show up, and shift culture are abundant.
If you find, amidst all of this, that youreexperiencing joy, hey lean into that experience.
Youre numb, apathetic, or even annoyed.
But there are a few things to keep in mind.
For starters, everyone processes emotions differently, Jackson says.
Its also quite reasonable to be confused over whythisparticular moment has opened the outrage floodgates.
Youre dealing with older memories this has triggered.
This was going on in the 60s, and here we are again, Lee-Okonya says.
Thats secondary trauma, she explains.
Youre hopeful about the future.
You no longer have to shoulder the burden of racism alone.
This is a good reason to feel hopeful.
You are struggling with guilt or shame.
While guilt and shame arent pleasant emotions, several therapists say theyre common right now.
Theres guilt in many forms, Harshom-Brathwaite says.
There might also be guilt if youve been more quiet or inattentive to police brutality before, she explains.
Grappling with feelings of guilt and shame is a normal byproduct of a society steeped in racism and anti-Blackness.
Youre still very concerned about COVID-19.
All over the country, states are seeing rises in new cases.
Its totally fine if managing your health is a priority right now.
If youre dealing with emotions that arent on this list, know that your feelings are valid.
