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Chances are, you may have already experienced a few signs of emotional unavailability without even realizing.
Juan Moyano/Getty Images
Perhaps youve fallen for the classic commitment-phobe (hello,Mr.
BiginSex and the City) who has you constantly second-guessing where you stand.
Or youve run into cases of people building walls and detaching after gettinghurt in the past.
But just because someone closes themselves off doesnt necessarily mean they dont care about you.
Rather, they might not know how to show it.
(The less you know, the less exposed they are to getting their heart broken.)
Without those, its nearly impossible to experience that kind of fulfilling connection.
To start breaking down these barriers, you first have to understand what emotional unavailability looks like.
Here are a few major signs.
Theyre sending mixed messages.
In these situations, emotional distance is likely at play, experts say.
Speaking of which…
2.
They keep conversations surface-level.
Youre probably not going to dive into your complex childhood trauma or deepest insecurities with just anyone.
But with your partner?
You should be comfortable sharing those parts of yourself (eventually).
They withdraw during your moments of vulnerability.
To be fair, developing intimacy within relationships takes time, Lurie points out.
Its not uncommon to be uncomfortable at first.
According to Lurie, they may revert back to flirting and jokes to dodge those topics.
This is your issue, not mine).
Theyre reluctant to define the relationshipor acknowledge long-term potential.
But the moment the conversation shifts to What are we?
(whether its hard-launching on social media or a casual mention of the future), they panic.
What to do about an emotionally unavailable partner
Letting someone inreallyinisnt going to happen overnight.
You cant force a notoriously tight-lipped lover to let their guard down.
(For more tips on encouraging your SO to open up,read this.)
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