It was surreal, Erin recalls of her first trip to the sperm bank to pick up their purchase.
Im driving across [Seattles] Floating Bridge with sperm in my passenger seat.
It was like sperm is my co-pilot.
After meeting in 2012 and marrying in 2014, the couple wasready to expand their family.
Erin, 41, had already given birth to two children during a previous marriage.
Shed also survivedovarian cancerwhere she lost an ovary and fallopian tube.
They could think of only one man they would trust with such an important request.
When he declined, the couple moved forward withSeattle Sperm Bank(SSB).
Most appealing to the Alders about SSB over other sperm banks they researched was its photo matching service.
They take your pictures and give you suggestions of donors that resemble your family.
They listened to audio interviews, read donor bios, and reviewed personality tests before making a final decision.
It was comical, Rachel says.
It has to be very, very slow putting it in, otherwise itll squirt right back out.
That was another thing we learned that first time, Rachel says.
We kinda went a little fast.
You go really, really slow.
It probably takes seven to ten minutes to put that tiny amount in.
After the sperm was deposited, Rachel had to stay lying down for at least the next hour.
Wed been flying by the seat of our pants .
and there are people that can help us do this, Erin says.
With Kali, the Alders now have a more holistic and scientific view of the donor insemination process.
This is not just a medical issue.
With Kali at the helm of Rachels pre-conception care, Rachel is monitoring her body more closely than ever.
Alongside age and timing,overall health is one of the biggest factors in a womans ability to conceive.
For Rachel, that means doing anything I can do to reduce the toxic load on my body.
This is our future child, she says.
Its worth all the effort in the world.
With any insemination, however,timing is everything.
During this brief twelve-hour period, Kali comes to the Alders home to perform the insemination.
After two more inseminations earlier this year, Rachel is still waiting to conceive.
Its pretty sad, she says quietly crying.
The rest we just have to, and her voice trails off.
Itll happen when its time, she finishes.
It will happen when its time, but a sense of urgency remains all the same.
Conceiving through donor inseminationisnt cheap.
Buying sperm, shipping costs, midwife and insemination fees, it all adds up.
All of their expenses, except acupuncture, are out-of-pocket.
The couple estimates theyve spent somewhere between $8,000 and $9,000.
Rachel adds, Weve got to do this the right way.
The couple is taking the summer off from trying to inseminate.
Rachel is working on getting her progesterone up.
If her levels are up in August, theyll work with Kali to inseminate in September.
Today, Rachel is staying tapped into her body and all the information it gives her.
My body is smarter than my mind.
*Rachel Alder is this writer’s sister.
