reps ready to jump in if the conversation goes offtrack.
But thanks to the globalcoronavirus pandemic,Angelica Rossand I are meetingwhere else?on Zoom.
Were here to talk about work and politics and identity, but the conversation ultimately flows in many directions.
Chris Barker
Ive said many times that I dedicate my work to Black girls.
I place our priorities first because no one else does.
The conversation below has been edited for length.
Chris Barker. Wardrobe styling by Shibon Kennedy at Cartel & Co. Hair by César DeLeön Ramirêz at crowdMGMT. Makeup by Yolonda Frederick at crowdMGMT. On Angelica: Top by Sandy Liang. Skirt by Prada. Coat by Rokh. Sandals by Marséll. Necklace by Adeam.
Crissle West: This year has been rough.
Have you been doing anything new to help you cope with everything going on?
Angelica Ross: I struggled in the beginning.
Chris Barker. Wardrobe styling by Shibon Kennedy at Cartel & Co. Hair by César DeLeön Ramirêz at crowdMGMT. Makeup by Yolonda Frederick at crowdMGMT. On Angelica: Suit and blouse by Alexander McQueen.
I had plans just like everybody else had plans.
I had jobs lined up all year, honey.
But you cant plan for a pandemic.
Chris Barker. Wardrobe styling by Shibon Kennedy at Cartel & Co. Hair by César DeLeön Ramirêz at crowdMGMT. Makeup by Yolonda Frederick at crowdMGMT. On Angelica: Suit, blouse, belt and shoes by Alexander McQueen.
I honestly have been in deep, deep, deep prayer.
I feel like I was born for this moment.
Ive had to grapple over the years with my relationship to chaos and challenges.
Chris Barker. Wardrobe styling by Shibon Kennedy at Cartel & Co. Hair by César DeLeön Ramirêz at crowdMGMT. Makeup by Yolonda Frederick at crowdMGMT. On Angelica: Blazer by Y/Project. Cropped Blazer and skirt by Phlemuns.
Being a Black trans woman, all Ive known is challenge.
Youve had to struggle financially and wonder where your next meal is coming from.
Let me tell you.
Chris Barker. Wardrobe styling by Shibon Kennedy at Cartel & Co. Hair by César DeLeön Ramirêz at crowdMGMT. Makeup by Yolonda Frederick at crowdMGMT. On Angelica: Blazer by Y/Project. Cropped Blazer and skirt by Phlemuns.
The approval emails came in from Lyft and Uber because guess what I wont be?
And I got that WAP.
For some folks, they find thats their calling.
Chris Barker. Wardrobe styling by Shibon Kennedy at Cartel & Co. Hair by César DeLeön Ramirêz at crowdMGMT. Makeup by Yolonda Frederick at crowdMGMT. On Angelica: Suit by Rebels to Dons. Top is stylists own. Belt by Frame. Bag by Petit Kouraj.
For others, its survival.
Theres levels to this.
I have so much self-worth now that I did not have before.
Chris Barker. Wardrobe styling by Shibon Kennedy at Cartel & Co. Backgrounds by Amy Elise Wilson at Sarah Laird. Hair by César DeLeön Ramirêz at crowdMGMT. Makeup by Yolonda Frederick at crowdMGMT. On Angelica: Top by Maryam Nassir Zadeh. Jeans (over) by Gucci. Jeans (under ) by H&M Studio. Denim thong by Collina Strada. Shoes by Acne Studios.
You know your worth.
Youve said before that youve had partners who didnt really accept you as your full self.
Can you talk a little bit about what being accepted as your full self feels like?
Chris Barker. Wardrobe styling by Shibon Kennedy at Cartel & Co. Backgrounds by Amy Elise Wilson at Sarah Laird. Hair by César DeLeön Ramirêz at crowdMGMT. Makeup by Yolonda Frederick at crowdMGMT. On Angelica: Top by Maryam Nassir Zadeh. Jeans (over) by Gucci. Jeans (under ) by H&M Studio. Denim thong by Collina Strada. Shoes by Acne Studios.
What are you looking for in your next relationship as far as what you will and wont tolerate?
What does a man need to have to catch Ms. Angelica Rosss attention?
You know, I get bored very easily with these men.
Chris Barker. Wardrobe styling by Shibon Kennedy at Cartel & Co. Backgrounds by Amy Elise Wilson at Sarah Laird. Hair by César DeLeön Ramirêz at crowdMGMT. Makeup by Yolonda Frederick at crowdMGMT. On Angelica: Pants and Vest by Christian Dior. Top by TLZ L' Femme. Earrings and ring by Syd & Pia. Bangle by Ursa Major.
It seems like theyre all operating out of the same playbook.
Someone who is secure in themselves.
You got to be fine with that because Im definitely fine with you not being on me like that.
Josiah Rundles. Wardrobe styling by Shibon Kennedy at Cartel & Co. Background by Amy Elise Wilson at Sarah Laird. Hair by César DeLeön Ramirêz at crowdMGMT. Makeup by Yolonda Frederick at crowdMGMT. On Angelica: Dress by Acne. Ring by Alighieri.
When I tell you every dude has been questionable up to this pointevery single last one of them.
And thats how you know they aint in it.
To be honest, Ive entertained my friends with benefits in the Hollywood circle.
Im human just like everybody else.
The dudes who are rushing to be serious are well below my vibrational frequency, lets just say that.
You know what I mean?
Then, in this weird sense, I feel spiritually protected.
I feel Im here for a reason, and its just not done yet.
These are human beings who are being brutalized right in front of our faces.
I wonder if you have any opinions on how our society can really work toward meaningful change?
I dont believe in guns.
Ive been in the military, but its just not for me.
I am getting a Doberman, though, and Im getting it trained to have that kind of protection.
At this point, I think folks are going to have to learn that they cant fuck with us.
Theyre definitely not doing that for Black cis women.
Laws cant govern me because they dont have context for my life.
I cant allow the world to have any standing in the decisions that I make in growing.
By any means necessary, Im going to blossom.
Lets not turn our heads away from the accomplices.
Black cis women and just society at large being an accomplice to creating these circumstances.
Its adding to him performing this toxic masculinity for you.
And so many cis Black gay men and women do not have our back as trans people.
People think that we have harmony underneath the rainbow.
Everyoneand when I say everyone, I mean everyoneneeds to come to the table ready to talk about accountability.
If you aint got nothing nice to say, go back to the books, go back to Google.
Aint nothing wrong with learning, just shutting up and learning.
Lets talk a little bit about this election thats coming up.
I know you said earlier this year that youre not endorsing a candidate.
Do you still feel that way?
I think everyone should vote if they can, and I think they should vote for Joe Biden.
This is not me endorsing him.
We must, at all costs, separate ourselves from this dude immediately.
But with Joe Biden, you do not have my endorsement.
Lets talk about reproductive health for Black women.
Lets talk about the education system.
Lets talk about housing for Black trans women and how they can get into homeless shelters.
Joe Biden is not talking about defunding the police.
So until youre talking about that, you definitely would not have my endorsement.
Shooting someone in the back seven times is not the proper way to respond.
Fucking stop, right goddamn now, and get somebody else in there.
This has to change now, and I cant wait until November.
Everybodys not going to make it to the polls.
When it comes to being trans, its a calling to blossom.
As a queer woman, Im watching it like, Ooh, I feel that.
With being the trailblazer.
So many people feel seen who have never felt seen before.
And so they put in a lot on you, but you are handling it beautifully.
There’s nothing like experience.
And what Hollywood has not had is a lot of experience with trans people.
Though they have a lot of poor experience of telling trans stories.
So there has been this learning curve on both sides of the situation.
People don’t hear me talk often about my experience of working onClaws.
And there’s a reason for it.
Someone referred to me as he.
I had a scene that was dropped on me.
I knew the scene was coming and we had talked about it.
It was one of the hardest things for me to do because I was pre-op.
These garments aren’t made for trans people.
I actually had to take a vacation after that.
I went to Miami.
I dont know if its cause I had my stomach out and I have a six-pack.
Im now beginning to survey my entire presentation and feeling clockable.
Then a Buddhist friend hit me up and was like, Hey, were having a meeting down here.
You want to come?
And as were chanting, I ended up getting this dose of healing through chanting with these women.
Some of their voices are low.
Some of them are high.
First of all, Im so sorry.
Its deeper than just, Oh, well, its a show, its a set.
Thats whats missing from most of the depictions of trans people that weve seen in media.
The full scope of humanity.
Like inAce Ventura,where theyre throwing up because he kissed a trans woman.
I was like, How did we think this was the funniest movie?
You get to be that light to people who did not have that.
That ties into the whole Emmy conversation.
Candy Ferocity is that bitch, period.
The key is what you just said.
Its one thing to say it; its another thing to acknowledge.
This is not about an award show.
Its about a body of people who are voting.
These are the people I work with.
A lot of Hollywood still wants to ignore these trans performances.
Right now, just like America, Hollywood loves symbols and symbolism more than it loves actual change.
In 2020, theres no excuse for that.
It just dont make sense.
Thats why horror is about to start looking a lot different.
Obviously it has been, with Jordan Peele.
Somebody make it happen.
How are you feeling about the whole haircut thing?
My glam squad wasnt necessarily immediately thrilled that I was cutting all my hair off.
They get it though, and they see how much it reveals of myself.
The joy is just radiating off of you.
Your team said that cutting your hair wasnt just about hair, but having new skin revealed.
What does that mean for you?
Do you feel like youre coming out of your cocoon in a way?
Its more than I just dont like this about myself.
And so thats what I needed to see, not just the beauty, but myself.
And I was going to say my womanhood, but Im even speaking beyond that.
I dont need to prove my womanhood to nobody at this point.
People can say what they want, this administration can write what they want.
I dont need to fight for my truth.
I need to be able to look at myself stripped down in the mirror and love myself.
And its kind of radical to do that in front of people.
And thats what I took a risk in doing.
Your womanhood, it is you.
It is part of who you are.
I think thats another message that cis and trans people both need to internalize.
You dont have to pass or perform so you can be a woman.
I can have that Beyonce wig on or not.
Im still the same girl.
Now when I remove a wig or makeup, I only feel more beautiful, not less.
I could not always say that in the beginning of my transition.
I needed the hair.
Or you’ve got the option to reject what youre seeing and not see me at all.
My body felt more of service to these mens fetishes than my own desires.
It wasnt until I transitioned that my body now is something that I claim and that I enjoy.
Im in the process of taking better care of my body.
So my space is a reflection of me doing that.
If we move to a different part of my place, its where I go chant.
Another part is where Im writing and where Im giving myself the space to do morning pages.
Girl, let me illustrate this real quick here.
I got right here across from my desk, this microphone stand.
Im cutting an album right now.
I have to get up every day and do vocal warm-ups.
People are like, Angelica, how are you doing all this stuff?
This shit didnt come easy.
Now everything thats around me is supporting all the stupid dreams that I have that are coming true.
You deserve to have all of that and then some.
I know you signed a production deal with Pigeon.
Ive got three shows right now that were developing.
One of the scripted shows is calledThe Turning Point.
Then I have another show that were already starting to film.
It follows some of the movers and shakers here in the Atlanta scene that we dont usually see.
Then my big scripted show is calledStilettos.
Its really my life story, my baby.
You wear a trillion different hats.
Youve already accomplished so much as an entrepreneur, actor, and you got this new development deal.
Is there anything youre still hoping to achieve in particular in your career?
Careerwise, I feel like Im on cruise control.
Im not frantic running after every opportunity.
I just had an audition for a major television show that I missed.
And it was no sweat off my back because I am booked and busy already.
Thats an incredible space to be in.
As a Black trans woman… Go ask Ryan Murphy how I work.
And I dont mean that in a really light sense.
I was so touched when he tweeted about that because he knows how I show up towork.
These are long-ass days.
Lets not forget the talent.
And roll the tape.
Do you feel like there are still any roadblocks or discrimination that you face in your career?
The biggest roadblock that is standing in my way is me.
That I am the person that gets called on for certain conversations.
Yes, wheres the adults?
Then I have these moments where Im affirmed.
Im sitting one on one across from Nancy Pelosi, talking about the state of affairs.
Im sitting across from John Lewis.
Im sitting across from Barack Obama.
Im getting calls from Michelle Obamas crew.
I still care a little bit more than I should about what people think about me.
The biggest grave truth that I need to break through right now is to fully come into myself.
And thats why I shaved my head.
So that I could almost speed up the process.
Youre already that bitch and you feel like you havent even fully stepped into yourself.
So once you do, child, everybody step back.
Hair by Cesar DeLeon Ramirez at crowdMGMT.
Makeup by Yolonda Frederick at crowdMGMT.
On Angelica: Pants and vest by Christian Dior.
Top by TLZ L' Femme.
Shoes by Brother Vellies.
Earrings and ring by Syd & Pia.
Bangle by Ursa Major.
