In March, Judge Lindsey Kushner heard an alcohol-relatedsexual assaultcase.
Then last week, Kushner appeared onGood Morning Britain.
But a metaphor got her back into trouble.
YouTube/Good Morning Britain
“We don’t like burglars and they shouldn’t burgle,” she said.
“But we do close and lock our doors at night.
Anybody who leaves them openthey’re not protecting themselves and their belongings.”
So on the one hand, women are entitled “drink themselves into the ground.”
But on the other, if they drink, they’re failing to protect themselves from potential assailants.Hm.
I’m not gonna liethere’s a lot going on here.
Judge Kushner just wants women to stay safe in a world where rape is far too common.
These wishes are important.
And even though there’s been a lot of back and forth, these goals aren’t mutually exclusive.
“Everybody should be safeyou should always be safe with everything you do.
Pinero explains that while he understands where Kushner was coming from, her statement “misses the point.”
“We shouldn’t have to live in a world in which people have to monitor their drinking.”
And statements like these can distract people from what they should be focusing on in these conversations.
“Sexual assault is a choicejust like burglary is a choice,” Pinero says.
“You don’t rape anyone.
You don’t rape men, you don’t rape women, and you don’t assault children.
You don’t do that.
And the real issue we should be talking about is that someone has chosen to do that.”
Kushner is right when she says rapists are to blame for rapejust like burglars are to blame for burglaries.
But she gets into trouble when she tells women they’re making themselves vulnerable when they drink.
This idea of someone “not protecting themselves” or “opening themselves up to danger” is misleading.
When you pick up a cocktail, you’re not consenting to being raped.
This can lead them tostay quietabout their experienceand to not get help at all.
“It can make them feel like theycan’t come forward,” Pinero says.
They continue to battle it alone, because they’re too afraid to talk about it.”
Again, Kushner could have had the best of intentions when she asked women to be wary.
But women shouldn’thaveto be wary.
And they also shouldn’t feel at fault for failing to be wary 24/7.
And friendly reminder: Men get assaulted, too.
“This shouldn’t happen to anyone,” Pinero says.
“Nobody has the right to assault someone else.”
More resources are available online from theNational Sexual Violence Resource Center.
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