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Have you seen the bi chair?
Catherine Servel. Wardrobe Styling by Sean Knight. Prop Styling by Maxim Jezek at Walter Schupfer. Makeup by Toby Fleischman at Tomlinson. Hair by Charles Dujic at Tomlinson. Manicure by Emi Kudo at Opus. On Evan Rachel Wood: Suit by Christian Wijnants. Bra by Kiki de Montparnasse.
she asks me excitedly.
We are deep in conversation about her recent obsession with internet memes about bisexuality.
Like Wood, Im alsobi.
Catherine Servel. Wardrobe Styling by Sean Knight. Prop Styling by Maxim Jezek at Walter Schupfer. Makeup by Toby Fleischman at Tomlinson. Hair by Charles Dujic at Tomlinson. Manicure by Emi Kudo at Opus. On Evan Rachel Wood: Jacket and skirt by Dries Van Noten. Bra by Kiki de Montparnasse. Vest by Helmut Lang (vintage).
So yes, Ive absolutely seen the bi chair.
That’s why it made me laugh so hard, she says.
Because I didn’t even realize it was a thing until I started looking back at pictures of myself.
Catherine Servel. Wardrobe Styling by Sean Knight. Prop Styling by Maxim Jezek at Walter Schupfer. Makeup by Toby Fleischman at Tomlinson. Hair by Charles Dujic at Tomlinson. Manicure by Emi Kudo at Opus. On Evan Rachel Wood: Shirt by Maison Martin Margiela. Bustier by Kiki de Montparnasse. Pants by Samuel Gui Yang.
I thought, Wecan’tsit!
You might even say shes reached bicon status (bi icon, for the straights).
And in April 2019, Wood testified in front of the California Senate Public Safety Committee.
Catherine Servel. Wardrobe Styling by Sean Knight. Prop Styling by Maxim Jezek at Walter Schupfer. Makeup by Toby Fleischman at Tomlinson. Hair by Charles Dujic at Tomlinson. Manicure by Emi Kudo at Opus. On Evan Rachel Wood: Skirt by Dries Van Noten. Bra by Kiki de Montparnasse. Vest by Helmut Lang (vintage). Shoes by Clergerie Paris.
Now Wood wants to bring the Phoenix Act to other states.
That just didn’t compute in my brain.
Wood hasnt named her abuser.
Catherine Servel. Wardrobe Styling by Sean Knight. Prop Styling by Maxim Jezek at Walter Schupfer. Makeup by Toby Fleischman at Tomlinson. Hair by Charles Dujic at Tomlinson. Manicure by Emi Kudo at Opus. On Evan Rachel Wood: Shirt by Maison Martin Margiela. Bustier by Kiki de Montparnasse. Pants by Samuel Gui Yang.
Its because, quite simply, she still doesnt feel safe or protected enough to name him.
Im so scared, she tells me.
People are like, Why don’t you name your abuser?
Catherine Servel. Wardrobe Styling by Sean Knight. Prop Styling by Maxim Jezek at Walter Schupfer. Makeup by Toby Fleischman at Tomlinson. Hair by Charles Dujic at Tomlinson. Manicure by Emi Kudo at Opus. On Evan Rachel Wood: Shirt by Maison Martin Margiela.
It was too late.
I don’t want this to be my story, she says.
I hate that this is my story.
Catherine Servel. Wardrobe Styling by Sean Knight. Prop Styling by Maxim Jezek at Walter Schupfer. Makeup by Toby Fleischman at Tomlinson. Hair by Charles Dujic at Tomlinson. Manicure by Emi Kudo at Opus. On Evan Rachel Wood: Suit by Ludovic de Saint Sernin. Bustier by Kiki de Montparnasse. Shoes by Clergerie Paris. Sunglasses by Alain Mikli.
I hate having to talk about it.
I hate having to relive it.
But that’s why I have to do it.
Catherine Servel. Wardrobe Styling by Sean Knight. Prop Styling by Maxim Jezek at Walter Schupfer. Makeup by Toby Fleischman at Tomlinson. Hair by Charles Dujic at Tomlinson. Manicure by Emi Kudo at Opus. On Evan Rachel Wood: Suit by Christian Wijnants. Bra by Kiki de Montparnasse.
If its not me, its going to be some other survivor.
One of Woods goals is to shine a spotlight ondomestic violencespecifically.
Among other things, she wants to shatter the narrative of Why don’t you just leave?
Catherine Servel. Wardrobe Styling by Sean Knight. Prop Styling by Maxim Jezek at Walter Schupfer. Makeup by Toby Fleischman at Tomlinson. Hair by Charles Dujic at Tomlinson. Manicure by Emi Kudo at Opus. On Evan Rachel Wood: Suit by Christian Wijnants. Bra by Kiki de Montparnasse.
Nearby shelters could be full.
Someones abuser might havecontrol over their financesor their car.
It’s not always that easy to leave, Wood says.
They take away your privacy or take away your freedoms.
They assume that if they were in that situation, they would act differently, she says.
And so her advocacy work continues.
Evan Rachel Wood is one such person.
Wood says that symptoms of CPTSD regularly affect her life.
I ask if Wood has read it.
She has, and its the first book she recommends for anyone with PTSD.
Sometimes I’m afraid to be alone in my house, she says.
Sometimes I can’t even go out of my front door to get a package.
I’m that scared.
Go out your front door.
But your body is paralyzed.
It just won’t do it, because the memory is still in your body.
I would love to not talk about this and never think about it again.
But thats not possible.
It was like an avalanche when Me Too hit, Wood says.
It was difficult to get out of bed sometimes.
But she also can see the value in it.
For example, she says that testifying publicly made her feel validated in a way she hadnt anticipated.
That was like the first time I really just, like, let it go.
I knew I had been heard and then I realized, Holy shit, that’s all I wanted.
Which was for someone to acknowledge this did happen and to hear me.
It was just such a powerful thing.
Theres no way to lie to yourself about where we are, Wood says.
Here it is right in your face.
A big part of that is in building and nurturing friendships with people who support her.
I have friends that understand my past and my trauma, she says.
They understand my PTSD.
It doesn’t matter what time of night it is.
I can call them at three in the morning and say, I need you right now.
And they will show up and they will hold my hand until I fall asleep.
In it, she has coping mechanisms galore, thanks, in part, to being a self-help obsessive.
Shes also a huge believer in therapy and getting mental health treatment from a medical professional.
And crying helps a lot too.
I cry all the time now, she says.
And it’s not a be-all, end-all solution.
No, it’s their job to lead you to water, but you’re doing the work."
Asking for help hasnt always come naturally to her.
Thats not to say Wood doesnt think anger can be healing sometimes.
Some days I just have to be mad, she says.
She also recognizes the cathartic value of just…destroying shit.
To that end, Wood says she sometimes goes to rage rooms.
Last year Wood rallied some friends to go to the rage roomafter the Kavanaugh hearings.
We were like, Okay, we’re going," she recalls with a laugh.
Frankly, it’s a familiar 2019 mood.
When everything is going to shit, what else can you do but laugh and rage?
“There was no other way to deal with it in that moment,” she says.
Maybe next time.)
As the mother of a six-year-old son, Wood understands this well.
Wood is modeling behavior for her son in other ways too.
I can only hope that I am raising a good man, she says.
Its just as much a conversation about boys.
I feel like we’re failing them by not addressing the fact that there is this culture of violence.
Wood took her son into consideration when deciding whether to come forward with her domestic violence story.
She knew that one day he might read her testimonies, or discover other artifacts of her past.
And he was sad about it, she says, but he was also okay.
More than anything, he was just happy that his mom was okay.
I think it inspired him to want to be a better person, she says.
Kids are actually more understanding than adults most of the time, Wood says.
They can actually handle a lot if you’re just really honest with them and give them a chance.
They have such open hearts and are so willing to learn and have these conversations.
She shakes her head no.
I used to think being strong was not being affected, she says.
you’re free to break and still be strong.
All told, Wood recognizes that the work of healing might never be donenot completely.
I got past this!"
You’ve got to work on it again.
Its an ongoing process.
We were actually talking about you, Wood tells him.
I use the moment to ask her whether shes talked to him about her sexuality.
He was like, ‘I think that would be amazing.
That would be so cool!
A lot of people are like, Why do you not have any public relationships with women?
I’m like, I have not hidden any of my relationships with women.
We’ve been photographed together.
We’d been out and about.
Everyone just always assumed we were friends.
You know, just gals being pals.
Wood has some other bisexual grievances, while shes at it.
I just have to know: Is this a date?).
And then theres the fact that she never felt she could be open about her sexuality growing up.
I was like, ‘So kids are out in school now.’
And she said, Oh yeah, there’s tons of kids out, Wood says.
That just blows my mind.
I had astrology, music, and Disney, she says.
That was the holy trinity.
She is unsurprisingly thrilled to be inFrozen II.Disney taught me how to sing, she says.
I had to ask: Did she know that some people were rooting for Elsa to be gay?
And oh, she knows.
I like to set completely unrealistic standards for myself and matching them.
I can be really hard on myself, she says.
I have to be okay with something not being perfect, which is hard.
But I know at this point that Ill feel worse if I didnt try.
After a long detour into the contours of Woods natal chart (Pisces moon, Sagittarius rising!
I’m saying it right now, she says.
The rest she keeps to herself, presumably until she undoubtedly accomplishes them.
So I ask: What are the things that are truly difficult for Wood to talk about?
She has to think about that one.
Good-byes, she says.
Ive got a real problem with endings and accepting the end of things sometimes.
I dont push it.
Were all, we agree, a little fucked up.
I ask as we prepare to part ways.
I don’t know, Wood says.
But the good news about that is none of us are alone in it.
