I mostly pick my face, Daniela W., who hasskin-picking disorder, tells SELF.
But also my scalp, my back, and my chest.
For me, the scarring is the most distressing part.
Morgan Johnson
Theyre not deep scars, but I have a lot of them.
Despite how many people have it, skin-picking disorder is often misunderstoodsometimeseven by therapists.
Its rare that I find someone who has actually heard of it, even professionals, Daniela says.
Some people tend to dismiss skin-picking disorder as just another bad habit.
After all, who hasntpopped a zitor incessantly yanked at a cuticle?
But compulsive skin-picking is a recognizedmental healthdisorder, with potentially life-changing results like painful wounds and serious infections.
People cant just stop and instead need specialized treatment to manage their symptoms.
Skin-picking disorder is a body-focused repetitive behavior, or BFRB.
BFRB is an umbrella term for different kinds of compulsive self-grooming.
Other BFRBs includetrichotillomania(hairpulling),cheek-biting, andonychophagia(nail-biting).
That doesnt mean BFRBs are the same asOCD, though.
Of course, its completely possible to pick at your skin without having a BFRB.
So when does this behavior cross the line into a disorder?
Its very common to pick at pimples, blisters, and scabs, says Santner.
Its something that were often not aware of until weve already done it, Daniela says.
Sometimes youre doing it while doing something else, like reading, or youre just in a trance-like state.
By its very nature, skin-picking disorder causes an emotional roller coaster.
Its absolutely sheer panic, Serena, who spent years co-organizing a BFRB support group, tells SELF.
Like, Theres a problem, and I need to deal with it immediately!
The pain that you feel when youre doing it is almost pleasurable.
Its a massive sense of relief because youve dealt with the problem.
A specific form of cognitive behavioral therapy called habit reversal training (HRT) is a mainstay of treatment.
The coronavirus pandemic presents new challenges for people with skin-picking disorder.
There are so many reasons why this pandemic is making life with compulsive skin-picking harder.
This is to reduce the chances of accidentally introducing the coronavirus into our systems via our fingers.
(While this isnt thought to be the main way the virus spreads, its still possible.)
But for someone like Daniela, thats nearly impossible.
In terms of face touching, it can definitely cause anxiety, she says.
A drastically different routine can also give rise to more picking.
Now that motivation has gone down.
Im taking fewer breaks and work is really stressful, so that causes me to pick more.
I think it calms me down.
The increase in video chats can be difficult, Serena says.
I did have a few really bad skin days where I didnt want people to see me.
So one bad day can be a massive knockdown.
Daniela has switched from days spent in a busy office to working at home.
BFRBs are really private behaviors that a lot of people dont do in public, she explains.
Daniela is generally still managing her condition much better than she has in the past, she explains.
Yesterday, I saw the mirror, and there was part of me that needed to release anxiety.
The result is a perfect storm of triggers and potentially feeling cut off from support networks.
People have to really be accepting that the urges are going to increase, Santner tells SELF.
Youre going to have slipups.
Do the best it’s possible for you to to have a lot of self-compassion.
Heres what people with skin-picking disorder can do to live as well as possible right now.
Despite the challenges, there are still plenty of practical steps to manage skin-picking during the pandemic.
If youre stuck at home, cover mirrors, Santner says.
If you use tools [to pick], put them in the freezer.
You dont have to throw them away, but you want to make things more difficult for yourself.
Im trying to exercise, eat healthfully, and sleep enough, says Serena.
She adds that its important to be kind to yourself when things dont go exactly as planned.
Im trying to learn to be self-compassionate and not beat myself up.
If you have a day where you just want to watch Netflix, thats fine.
Its also a good idea to stay connected with other people.
If video meetings are too stressful, thats valid.
My friends, family, and partner know, and that has been really helpful.
If youre not ready to do that, thats cool too.
Ultimately, living well with skin-picking disorder during theCOVID-19 pandemicwill be different for everyone.
Its not about being perfect or feeling ashamed for struggling during a hugely stressful global crisis.
I think its a misconception that recovery means you dont do it anymore, Santner says.
Recovering and living well [happen] when you feel good about yourself.
Its when you feel like you have control instead of the behavior having control over you.
That doesnt mean being pick-free, necessarily.
It means that if you have a slipup, youre able to keep going and get back on track.
*Name has been changed.
