It can be hard to realize you have a shortage of friends in adulthood.
If you add achronic illnessinto the mix, its even more challenging.
Some people can step up and support you, and some wontor cant.
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Just because its hard, though, doesnt mean its impossible.
Here are five expert-recommended ways to make new pals if you have a chronic condition.
Find your people.
It can be incredibly isolating to live with a chronic condition.
It’s so unbelievable being surrounded by them because I don’t have to explain anything, Pedra says.
Explore new hobbies that support your needs.
One way to find future besties is to pick up new activities, either virtual or in-person.
But shifting that energy outward to help others can help us feel better.
Be honest about your illness when youre ready.
You dont have to tell every person you meet about ongoing symptoms or challenges.
She has lived withCrohns diseasesince she was a teenager and specializes in treating people with chronic conditions.
Acknowledging your own discomfort and fear is a good way to lead, Willard Virant tells SELF.
And often its not one conversation, its multiple, as your friendships deepen and grow.
I shouldve done this decades ago.
That way, the person knows how they can best support you.
Dont underestimate the value of acquaintances.
Sometimes a simple conversational exchange with someone who is kind can brighten your day.
Give people second chances.
Making new friends, especially as a person with a chronic illness, doesnt always go as planned.
Try not to personalize people’s insensitivity as rejection because they just don’t know.
Sometimes, thats a teaching moment.
Give other people the opportunity to show up for you, Dr. Lassiter says.
They cant do that if they dont know that theyre doing something to make you feel bad.
Are they diminishing your feelings?
Do they take a stab at change the subject?
Do you feel tense around this person?
The best red flag is your gut, Willard Virant says.
Our bodies are the real truth-tellers.
And dont blame yourself if a friendship crumbles.