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It broke my heart because I knew people were hurting, terrified, and seeking community.

photo of author on painted background with illustrated flowers around them

Stella Koh

Eight people were viciously murdered in three spas throughout the Atlanta area, six of whom were Asian women.

It became increasingly difficult to open my social media account without feeling overwhelming panic and dread.

And yet, the AAPI community began the courageous act of transforming pain into purpose.

How does one invite others to understand and cope with their fears without retraumatizing them again and again?

How do we make space for our grief without overwhelming our mental well-being with historically difficult-to-deal-with emotions?

These were the questions that kept me up at night.

But my mental health care journey began long before social media was even on my radar.

My decision to become a psychologist was an unexpected one, especially for my Asian immigrant parents.

A career in mental health was the last thing they expected.

After all, who goes to see a therapist?

Despite being thefastest-growing ethnic groupin the United States, we are theleast likely to utilize mental health services.

Suicidality is theleading cause of deathof Asian Americans and Pacific Islanders between the ages of 15 to 24.

Our community has been struggling with mental health for generations.

We needed more helpers who came from our own communities.

This is why I chose to become a psychologist.

But this doesnt come without its challenges.

Balancing the emotional needs of others, while most importantly caring for myself, is an ongoing struggle.

A struggle I would gladly take on again and again because this work is truly that important.

When I started my social media account in 2019, my life felt like it was in a tailspin.

I was raising two young children and my partner had a health condition that we could not explain.

I was emotionally crumbling under the weight of his illness and solo parenthood.

One night, I looked up the hashtag #asianmentalhealth.

To my surprise, there were fewer than 100 posts.

I wanted to change that, even if it was in my small corner of the internet.

It also facilitates community care.

Even as a psychologist, Ive struggled to findhealthy boundaries with social media.

I resolve not to expose my community to the ongoing reel of violence and hate.

We are aware this targeted violence exists and there is little benefit to constantly exposing ourselves to this information.

I also do not get involved in cancel culture.

In the end, we take care of each other and for that, I am so grateful.