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At the Indian Wells Open earlier this year,Naomi Osakas return to tennis was continuing wonderfully.
Then, she swiftly defeated Sloane Stephens in the first round.
But then it happened.
After her defeat, Osaka addressed the crowd while wiping away tears.
Brad Ogbonna. Styling, Sue Choi. Hair, Marty Harper at The Wall Group. Makeup, Autumn Moultrie at The Wall Group. On Naomi: Top, Issey Miyake.
To be honest, Ive gotten heckled before, it didnt really bother me, she said.
I dont know why, but it went into my head.
Perhaps Osaka herself felt it that day.
Brad Ogbonna. Styling, Sue Choi. Hair, Marty Harper at The Wall Group. Makeup, Autumn Moultrie at The Wall Group. On Naomi: Cardigan, Cult Gaia. Earrings, Leigh Miller.
I wanted to start listening to myself and doing things that I needed to do to protect my mindset.
Osaka is telling me this in emailed responses that get back to me via her publicist.
But I also wanted to tread lightly.
Brad Ogbonna. Styling, Sue Choi. Hair, Marty Harper at The Wall Group. Makeup, Autumn Moultrie at The Wall Group. On Naomi: Cardigan, Cult Gaia. Earrings, Leigh Miller.
It was a strange feeling and I was shocked that people cared that much.
As she continues, she sounds slightly incredulous about the impact of her actions.
It started a conversation that I think we all needed to start having.
Brad Ogbonna. Styling, Sue Choi. Hair, Marty Harper at The Wall Group. Makeup, Autumn Moultrie at The Wall Group. On Naomi: Jacket and trousers, Prabal Gurung. Tank, Parade. Earrings, Faris. Watch, Tag Heuer Aquaracer x Naomi Osaka. Shoes, Nike.
Osakas origin story is one that transcends borders.
She started playing tennis at age three, and counts Venus and Serena as role models.
The Williams sisters were such trailblazers and tackled so many issues head on, Osaka says.
Brad Ogbonna. Styling, Sue Choi. Hair, Marty Harper at The Wall Group. Makeup, Autumn Moultrie at The Wall Group. On Naomi: Cardigan, Cult Gaia. Earrings, Leigh Miller.
As a Black female athlete, I credit them for breaking down barriers for me.
(She lovedKing Richard, which she recently watched on a plane.
At the end I was crying, she says.)
Brad Ogbonna. Styling, Sue Choi. Hair, Marty Harper at The Wall Group. Makeup, Autumn Moultrie at The Wall Group. On Naomi: Top and skirt, Issey Miyake.
Naomi wasnt the only one in her family who was influenced by the Williamses.
Through watching videos, Francois learned from Richard Williamss attentive eye to his daughters talent and dedication.
(Mari also played.)
Like Richard, Francois moved his family to Florida so that both Naomi and Mari could receive better training.
Both sisters were homeschooled.
I have seen her play, Serena Williams told reporters.
Brad Ogbonna. Styling, Sue Choi. Hair, Marty Harper at The Wall Group. Makeup, Autumn Moultrie at The Wall Group. On Naomi: Jacket, Louis Vuitton. Pants, Nike x Naomi Osaka. Earrings, Faris.
Shes really young and really aggressive.
Shes a really good, talented player.
When the match was over, Osaka broke down in tears.
Even when Serena supported Osaka by putting an arm around her, the crowd booed and jeered.
I know that everyone was cheering for her to win, Osaka said in an address to the crowd.
Im sorry it had to end like this.
I just want to say thank you for watching the match.
For me it was just important to tell people how I was honestly feeling at the moment.
I have seen therapists in the past but not consistently until now, she says.
Im super happy that I found the right person who really understands me and has been incredibly helpful.
She understands how others can feel apprehensive about starting therapy.
It doesnt mean you are broken.
She reminds herself to put her phone down or not think about things, she says.
She also enjoys gaming, a hobby of hers since she was young.
(Her current favorites are Fortnite, Overwatch, Apex Legends, and the Elder Scrolls.)
Its all pretty surreal, Osaka says of the expansion.
It makes me proud.
Hes a big source of comfort for me.
Whenever you pick him up, he just becomes a big baby, she gushes.
Hes really good at cuddling.
I really love that about him.
The main goal is that we remind people they arenotalone, Osaka says.
For herself, the year Osaka spent focusing on her own mental wellness has been beneficial.
At this stage in my life I feel very content in my mental health journey.
I feel comfortable in who I am and where I have come from, Osaka says.
My interview process with Osaka lasted several weeks, happening right after the uproar at Indian Wells.
During this time, she was preparing for and competing in the Miami Open.
While awaiting her responses, sent between practices and recorded in busy airports, I tracked her progression carefully.
There were still tears at Miami, but this time, they were ones of satisfaction.
I have a new perspective and Im so appreciative that I have this career and platform.
Im also really energized and motivated.
In the meantime, Osaka is searching for something else.
My main goal used to be winning, she says.
Lately I have tried to ask myself questions like, Will this make you happy?
