Abstinence: how Jesus was born.
Its a wonderful fantasy.
Mary and Joseph loved each other so much that they didnt even need tohave sex to conceivea baby.
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Humanity got a savior without all the messiness of penises and vaginas.
Because as we learned in the garden, sex is bad for some reason.
Over the centuries (millennia?)
the concept of sex devolved into something sinful, much like murder is sinful.
(Youd be hard-pressed to find songs saying the same about so many other sins.)
And that’s a problem.
As I see it, it boils down to: Human beings are human beings.
But for the record, we baby-makers can control our own reproductive lives, thank you very much.
We dont need any manor legislatortelling us how/when/why to have sex or create a family.)
Consider our closest DNA relatives, the African great apes, especially bonobos and chimps.
We are all social, group-living creatures that thrive from community and cooperation.
Can you imagine a world where we genuinely felt responsible for each other?
We used to have that, and we messed it up somehow along the way.
This is all to say that sex enables bonding not only between individual people, but also between communities.
Some primitive human tribes dont have words for jealousy or monogamy or marriage.
These are concepts that do not exist.
Sex is so natural and so fun that everyone should be having it with everybody all the time!
(Dont forget thecondoms!)
There are plenty of theories why our divorce rate isas high as it is.
I’ll tell you what I see all too often when I counsel married patients.
Unsurprisingly, this leads to sexual dissatisfaction and decreased bonding between partners.
Its almost as though biology WANTS us to have sex, regardless of what the local clergy say.
Erection, vaginal lubrication, penis-in-vagina, ejaculation, ovulation, fertilization, implantation, pregnancy.
Your Gynecolumnist regularly donates toPlanned Parenthood.
Leah Torres, M.D., is a physician specializing in obstetrics and gynecology.
